Coventry SU:The skid marks on the underpants of the Uni club scene

I fear I may run the risk of being accused of defamation of character but I am not simply picking on a soft target for the sake of being rebellious or outspoken.  While the vast majority of Universities run very successful SU clubs and gig venues, Coventry is really letting the side down, especially to the tune of £4 a time.  I can guarantee I am not alone in this as even the doormen were shocked that a group of lads came from Loughborough uni for a night out.  They were even more startled to find out that these guys had actually been before and chose to return.
The entrance has all the glamour and sophistication of an NHS ward which has failed its government audit and the interior is reminiscent of a derelict aircraft hanger just with more cobwebs and a stickier floor.
While I shall refrain from commenting upon the service or drinks I should simply say that they won’t be winning any quality awards even if they were the only entrant in their category.
I arrived at 11 30 at night and one would expect most clubs to be filled with the sound of high quality dance beats or a track which represented the theme of the evening, I refer of course to themes such as Disco or 60s.  Instead I was met with “the lion sleeps tonight”; don’t get me wrong, it is a great song in itself, especially the Lady Smith version, but it aint what you want to hear in a club.  It certainly wasn’t conducive to dancing but was a positive motivator towards standing around idly and buying beer.  I mean honestly what were they thinking?  Was this George of the Jungle night or colonials and natives?

Perhaps I am being too harsh because you should always give a venue a chance to redeem itself, right?  I’m sorry to say the situation didn’t improve immediately.  The DJ had two chosen methods of cutting between songs.  The first is where he created a huge melee of white noise until the end of the first song had been totally obscured; the audience were left covering their ears (pretty good going in a club) until at last the next track began to take shape out of this cacophony.  The second, and certainly preferable solution was stopping dead one song and switching to the next; this of course being the lesser of two evils.  Anything under 4 seconds was a new DJ speed record.

I would be doing the DJ a great disservice if I didn’t mention that the quality of music and his rudimentary abilities did improve as the evening wore on.  But it was still not without a some what bizarre mix of musical genres.  I believe by following the golden rule of not letting drunk engineering students make requests the whole affair could be immediately improved without expending a penny.